Just for fun...

Ok, so I think I have a more serious post coming tomorrow (I was going to post it today but haven't finished yet), so in the meantime, here's one of the current Facebook tags that's going around now:

Here's the deal: Type in your name and the word "needs" in quotes ("YOUR NAME needs”) into your favorite search engine and post the first 10 that come up. For example, go to Google and type in Jane needs and see what comes up. This is pretty funny.

1. Beth needs to go home. (okay?)
2. Beth needs a life with pictures, videos, personal blog, interests, information about me and more.
3. Beth needs a laugh. (Definitely.)
4. Beth needs advice. (This is pretty much always true.)
5. Beth needs your help in getting to Cambodia! (Sure, why not? I love traveling!)
6. Beth needs a good kick. (Uh, no!)
7. Beth needs our prayers. (Yes, please!)
8. Beth needs a hobby. (Um, Beth needs TIME to have a hobby!)
9. Beth needs her helmet. (It's a dangerous world out there!)
10. Beth needs a watch when her phone is dead.

Mine aren't as interesting as ones I've seen for several other people, but whatever.

Happy Thursday!

Waiting

“Wait for the Lord; be strong, and let your heart take courage; wait for the Lord!” (Psalm 27:14)

I have to confess—this concept of “waiting for the Lord” is incredibly difficult for me, for at least two reasons. First, I am a dreamer; I have an incredibly active imagination that has led to many a grand plan being formed in my mind. All of these plans, of course, sound fabulous to me—though usually their implementation is a little fuzzier—and I have a terrible habit of forgetting to seriously pray about whatever it is and wait for God to give me guidance as to how (or even if) I should proceed.

Second, and probably more significant, is that I am in a hurry to do something, to make something of my life and to feel like I’m accomplishing something for God. First problem is that that is incredibly selfish; my sinful self wants assurance from people that I matter, when I really ought to be looking to God, in whom my worth is truly found, and then just living my life in obedience to Him whether or not it seems like I’m “accomplishing something.” I feel like I should have a plan, know why I’m doing what I’m doing right now and what I’ll do next. I ought to know where I’m headed so that I can be preparing for it now; otherwise, surely I am wasting valuable time.

However. This whole sense of being in a hurry and making my own plans is not consistent with the Bible. Psalm 46:10 says, “Be still, and know that I am God.” Be still. How often does that happen in my life, when I just step back from the craziness of life and just rest in the assurance that God is in control? I must admit, not very often.

Furthermore, by failing to completely rely on God and wait on both His plan and His timing, I begin to believe the lie that God doesn’t have my best interests in mind; if He did, wouldn’t He be putting my plans into action? (Obviously, it is a very good thing that He doesn’t go by my faulty plans, good though they may seem to me at the time.) I don’t ever verbalize this—not even to myself—but thinking about it now, it seems clear that this is all-too-frequently the mindset that I have. But again, this is so wrong. According to Psalm 25:10, “All the paths of the Lord are steadfast love and faithfulness, for those who keep His covenant and His testimonies.” Also, the verse that precedes the verse at the beginning of this post is an exclamation made by the psalmist, testifying to his certain hope that God had good things in store for him: “I believe that I shall look upon the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living!” Although God is not necessarily concerned about my happiness level, per se, He does have a perfect plan for my future—for each day of my life—and whether it seems “good” to me or not, if I am in a right relationship with Him—focusing on His Truth and seeking to know, love, and serve Him with all of my heart, mind, and soul—I will be able to see His goodness. And what, ultimately, could possibly be better than seeing the goodness of the One who is my Creator and Savior?

So, this is my note to myself, a reminder of where my focus should be and of what truly matters in life. I don’t really care if anyone reads this or responds; mostly, I just needed to put these thoughts into words as a tangible reminder for the times when I am impatiently “awaiting my future” or trying to make things work out according to my plans. May God by His grace enable me to abandon my selfish desires and seek only to follow Him, every day of my life.

Stories

Surprise! I'm back! Contrary, perhaps, to speculation due to my failure to post in 3 months, I have not dropped beyond the realm of existence, gone into hiding, or moved to Mars (or anywhere else for that matter -- yet). I've just been...mmm...busy, for one thing, but also I guess I just haven't really been up to writing.

However, at work today, a semi-regular customer made a comment that really made me think. This customer is one that has been coming in at least since I transferred to this store two-and-a-half years ago (though I myself was gone for about 15 months), and he knows a little of my background of having lived in several (ok, 8) cities thus far in my life (7 of which I've lived in since graduating from high school). Anyway, somehow we got on the subject of all of my moving/traveling (or maybe it was just that I'd lived in Haiti for awhile; don't remember). I said something about sometimes wishing that I'd done things the "normal" way (i.e. graduate from high school and then go to ONE --maybe 2-- college[s] and graduate in 4-5 years, not move a jillion times, etc, etc). He then responded by saying, "Well, I'm sure you have a lot of stories now" (or something to that effect).

At the time, I thought that was kind of an interesting perspective but didn't really think too much about it; after all, there was coffee to be brewed, a pastry case to be restocked, and customers to be rung up. Later, though, it struck me that it's very true; I do have all kinds of stories because of the somewhat unusual way my life has played out to this point. Granted, not all (or even very many) of them are stories that would interest other people, but still, they are a part of my life that God has used to shape me into who I am. Even though many of these stories seem to have played themselves out and are little but distant memories, they still have value because God has taught me so much through the happy and the sad, the funny and the painful moments of my life. Not only that, but perhaps by remembering these things, He can even now show me how He has been at work in my life.

So that's my pondering for the day. Not terribly deep, but at least it's something. Maybe it will inspire me to write more often so that sometime in the future, I can look back on this point in my life and be able to better recognize God's sovereign direction towards ... well, I don't know what, right now anyway. But that's ok; I don't have to know the future. The important thing (and what I have to keep reminding myself) is that God is absolutely and entirely in control of the universe, He has a plan for my life, and all I have to do is seek Him and enjoy being His.

For this God is our God for ever and ever; He will be our guide even to the end. (Psalm 48:14)

Delighting in Grace*

Delighting in grace ...what does this mean? I can't say I fully know, mainly because I do not fully understand God's incredible grace; it is undoubtedly greater and has influenced my life more than I even realize. What I do know, though, is that by His grace, He has shown me my desperate need for His salvation; He has enabled me to repent of my sins and follow Him, and as a result, He has transformed (and is continuing to transform) my life. "For the grace of God has appeared, bringing salvation for all people, training us to renounce ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright, and godly lives in the present age, waiting for our blessed hope, the appearing of the glory of our great God and Savior Jesus Christ, who gave Himself for us to redeem us from all lawlessness and to purify for himself a people for His own possession who are zealous for good works." (Titus 2:11-14) I obviously have a ways to go as far as living a self-controlled, upright, and godly life, but by His grace, I'm making slow but sure progress.

So where does "delighting" come in? I found this prayer by a Puritan author that, I think, captures this idea very well: "May the living God...make these our carnal minds so spiritual and heavenly, that loving Him, and delighting in Him, may be the work of our lives." Basically, as God graciously teaches me His ways and enables me to grow in godliness, I begin to focus more and more on “loving Him, and delighting in Him”; these things do become the “work of [my life]” and, essentially, my reason for being. What’s incredible is that this love and delight allows me to better recognize the presence and effects of God’s grace in my life, which only increases my love for and delight in Him all the more. Even an ever-increasing awareness of my sinfulness serves to deepen my gratitude for His mercy in forgiving me and His grace in working in and through me.

As I typed this last sentence, a song I remember hearing when I was younger popped into my mind:

Were it not for grace
I can tell you where I’d be
Wandering down some pointless road to nowhere
With my salvation up to me
I know how that would go
The battles I would face
Forever running but losing this race
Were it not for grace (Larnelle Harris, “Were It Not for Grace”)

How incredibly true, and so, I am delighting in grace.

* "Grace is God's unmerited favor by which He saves us and makes us righteous. It is based solely on His sovereign love, which is manifested in the perfect sacrifice of Jesus Christ for our sin. It is not the result of any worthiness on our part. Once we are saved we stand in grace." John MacArthur