You were reaching
through the storm
walking on the water
even when I could not see
in the middle of it all
when I thought You were a thousand miles away
not for a moment did You forsake me
not for a moment did You forsake me
after all You are constant
after all You are only good
after all You are sovereign
not for a moment will You forsake me
not for a moment will You forsake me
You were singing in
the dark
whispering Your
promise
even when I could not hear
I was held in Your arms
carried for a thousand miles to show
Not for a moment did You forsake me
Last Sunday, as I was wrapping up a wonderful week in Haiti (and trying desperately to pretend my time there wasn't so rapidly coming to a close), I tagged along with the fabulous Livesay crew for an amazing time of worship at the Meadows' home. We sang a few songs, and then we spent some time talking about God's faithfulness and how we've seen that play out in our lives. Everyone in the room has undeniably been through some "stuff," but it was so beautiful to hear the stories that were shared of how God has carried each of us through difficult circumstances and has brought so much good even out of the pain. It reminded me of something Beth McHoul had said earlier in the week, about how people who have suffered have a certain depth to them. I don't know that any of us would willingly choose to go through painful times, but yet, there is something to be said for the way God uses suffering to shape us, to strengthen us, to draw us closer to Him -- and, to help us empathize with and have compassion for others who are hurting. What an amazing thing to serve a God who not only sees all of our tears, but who also so faithfully brings beauty from ashes. We may not understand why things happen the way they do, why we must suffer, but it is so comforting to know that just as God heard the cries of the Israelites when they were enslaved to the Egyptians, so He sees and knows our pain, and He is with us. Though things are a bit of a blur from the time right after my mom died, I remember very clearly clinging to these verses and having a surreal sort of peace that, even though it felt like my world was falling apart, God was still in control:
The steadfast love of the LORD never ceases;
His mercies never come to an end;
they are new every morning;
great is your faithfulness.
"The LORD is my portion," says my soul,
"Therefore, I will hope in him."
Lamentations 3:22-24
I didn't know, and I don't know, why God chose to take my mom when He did. I wouldn't have chosen that, not in a million trillion years. But I do know and can say with confidence that He has shown Himself to be faithful time and time again in my life; how can I not then put my hope in Him?
Originally when I started this post, I was intending to write about how seventeen years ago today, I met my youngest sister. Her life is such a testimony of God's faithfulness; it is absolutely incredible to look back and see the many, many beautiful things He has brought out of her life -- this child, who was born with a life-threatening medical condition and then abandoned at birth and left to die at a Haitian hospital. The very fact that she lived more than a few days (let alone, nearly 18 years and counting) is a miracle of divine intervention, and that's just the very beginning of her story. Unfortunately, as much as I would love to keep writing about that now, I need to get in at least a little bit of studying tonight before I completely collapse in exhaustion from a crazy work day. But, if anyone is interested in knowing a little more about God used Lina's adoption to get our family involved in Haiti, here's a post from a few years ago.
Happy weekend :)
